Yesterday, my kids woke up at 5 am. We trudged downstairs and proceeded to watch cartoons while eating corn flakes. I cuddled up on the couch with a blanket while Pete snuggled with Will in the rocking chair. Ahhh, a happy little Sunday morning.
At one point, Ceci walked up to me holding out her hand. I extended my hand to receive what I assumed was a toy necklace.
Plop. "It's poop, mommy."
I looked down, and there it was. A disgusting, brown turd. In my hand.
"Ceci! Where did this come from?"
"On the couch, Mommy. It's poop. Yucky!"
"This was on the couch? That I'm laying on?"
"Yeah, it's poop."
"Thanks, I'm aware of that. Where did it come from though? Did you poop?"
I checked her diaper. No poop.
I threw the poop away and proceeded to do a "skeeved out" dance in the kitchen.
I have no idea where it came from or how long it had been sitting on my couch. I thought the purpose of diapers was to hold that shit in. Literally.
Can I have my Mom Card now?